Thursday, December 10, 2009

UK Crimbo Traditions

- Your family buys a tin of chocolate. Roses or Quality Street.
- The creams in said tin of chocolate get eaten first.
- Your Dad polishes off the caramels that no one wants a week after Christmas.
- Everyone must wear a stupid paper crown from the Christmas Crackers.
- Everyone must read out cracker jokes despite the fact they're always shit.
- Your Mum will get tipsy at some point. Maybe one of your Grandparents too.
- Every single family member that visits will be offered alcohol.
- You'll watch a Christmas special.
- You'll turn over the Snowman.
- The biggest present under the tree is always a disappointment.
- You'll be eating turkey sandwiches for days after Crimbo (I love them)
- You'll receive a card from someone you didn't send one to
- You'll watch an old school but downright awesome film (e.g. Home Alone, Uncle Buck, Cool Runnings)
- It WILL NOT SNOW SO GET OVER IT
- Someone will want to watch one of the many versions of a Christmas Carol. Don't let them.
- Your Happy New Year texts will not reach your friends until they're nursing their hangovers the next morning.
- You'll consume something you don't necessarily like (mince pies? christmas pudding? a snowball?) just because it's Christmas
- Your Dad will be in instruction manual heaven
- Someone will put a real damper on the celebrations by complaining about how they worked Christmas Eve/they have to work Boxing Day

If you didn't nod to at least 5 of those, I'm afraid you're not English.

2 comments:

absolute reality said...

Yay! I LOVE UK Christmas!!! :D x

Anonymous said...

I'm glad I don't spend Christmas with you. Sounds like like a 'riot'.