Tuesday, August 04, 2009


You break up with the love of your life. Totally didn't see it coming. You loved him. You felt sure he loved you.

You take refuge in your bedroom. Food doesn't taste the same, music doesn't sound as good. Nothing can replace him.

The months go by. You're living in denial, waiting for him to call, beg you to take him back. All's forgiven, the words are on your lips. Surely he'll call soon? Once he realises what he's missing. He's gonna call.

More months. You've been flirting with this totally smoking folk singer. He's adorable and you can kid yourself sometimes into believing you love him as much as you loved him. Your friends think this is it, the real deal. But late at night, you still dream of the one. No one's ever going to replace him.

The folk singer is hot. You take trips with him. You're happy. But still, the one is never completely gone. You still think of him. Wonder why it didn't work out. Why didn't you make more of an effort? Why didn't you show him how much you loved him? Could you have done more?

Could you have made him stay?
Little more than a year goes by. You and the folk singer are cosied up. You've heard things about the one, but not seen him since that day. An old friend calls...

The one. He's back in town. He's looking for you.

Vic gets mad when people post cryptic blogs. This might seem a little mellow dramatic to you guys and most of you won't believe me when I tell you this is exactly how I felt when Reuben disbanded. It felt as if my heart had been stomped on by a sumo wrestler.

For months, listening to music felt like taking bitter medicine. I needed it, but it didn't go down easy. And I kept waiting for it to all be a joke. Waiting for news. Anything.

I love Frank Turner, really, I do. And in time it felt like I was missing Reuben less. But no one can replace your first love. It was love. I loved them. More than anyone.

Now there's news. And it feels like my musical heart is beating again.

Good God I missed them. So, so much.

And we're- I mean, they're not getting back together. I knew better than to hope for that. But there is hope that we can be... friends.

You guys have no idea. My worries, my problems, my bitterness... feels like it's all floating away.

1 comment:

flowery mug said...

Going back to our Panic! At The Disco conversation..
Have you heard their new track?!?!?!!!!
I like it.. It'll grow on me by the end of the week I think..
"New Perspective"

Haha.. and the captcha reads "perexpit".. Very similar..